Tuesday, November 14, 2006

It Doesn't Stink

Since there has been a lot of hoopla and concern over this new miracle liquid the human woman has purchased, I thought I’d clarify a few things.

It has NO smell! No smell at all! Its completely odorless! No frou-frou smell, no fake flower smell, no fake piney smell... nothing. Its as if nobody had been there at all!

Everyone must block the following website: zero odor

It is EVIL! EVIL I TELL YOU!

Some also wondered about the special guest post from Sasha. Sasha has posted before on my blog, and other have as well, when they have something important to say. Sasha, Ray, and Isis worked very hard at driving their human man insane last night while their human woman went out to some foul store to buy things. I only felt that their accomplishments showed what potential we all have to drive our humans insane. I plan on continuing “Drive your humans insane week” tonight with something annoying, just haven’t figure out what yet. I prefer to work spur of the moment, whereas the gimpy mutatoe plots and schemes and plans and then gleefully brags about his exploits. Yes, he’s fine after his award winning puke on the area rug and mole killing. He made a desperate attempt at attention when he stole something off the bedroom end table and then guarded it.

I’ll never understand him. He steals and hoards. Doesn’t chew it up, doesn’t destroy it, just hoards. When he first came here, he’d steal every towel, blanket, pillow, or dirty piece of clothing, pile it up and lay on it. Sam, at least, use to drag the sheets into his crate and suck on them back when we were crated in the bedroom. he also managed to shred a down comforter by dragging it into his crate and sucking on that. It looked like it snowed in the bedroom. Human woman was not pleased, as apparently its very difficult to sew a sucked on, ripped down comforter without spewing feathers all over.

Oh, another thing, the human woman raked some leaves into a pile for the mutatoe. He LOVES laying in leaf piles. Makes him feel very important or something. The odd thing is... he pees on the leaf pile, then lays in the leaves. Ok, euw.

One last note... Holly.... don’t eat the bowl, just carry it around wherever the humans go and throw it ON their bare feet. If that fails, push button phones don’t require opposable thumbs, so dial your local SPCA and report this “diet” crap to them. I’m sure they’ll pick you up and feed you.

Meeshka

3 comments:

Holly said...

Meeshka,

Thanks for the advice. I keep thinking if I try eating the rug, or the plastic bowls they will feel bad and give me REAL food to eat. Not this green bean crap.

I'm also working on the Sad and Pathetic Look (see my blog for expert examples) to see if that will help.

I do have to admit, I'm a lot like your gimpy mutatoe brother Loki. I'm a stealer and hoarder myself. I don't want anyone else playing with something so I take it and hoard it too. It's just a way of telling everyone else they have to play by MY rules. If Loki isn't playing by YOUR rules, I think it's time for a body slam.

Your faithful servant,
Holly

Anonymous said...

oh meeshka! why oh why did you have to tell this doglet about the anti-smell stuff. mom was curious about it, she told me she was skeptical cause they didn't sell it in stores. if it worked SO good why wouldn't they sell it at petsmart? i think HULA should get involved and squash this money making venture of anti-smelliness! smells are great!!
(mom says thanks for the tip, she might buy some now!!)

JustMeCopper said...

My Mom might order some of that awful stuff. Thanks a lot Meeshka. I will have to work harder now to make my house smell like me.