The Failure of the Human Calendar


Once again we are reminded of the stupidity of humans, and their lack of telling time by the sun and their need for stupid things called calendars and watches.

We dogs don’t need stupid time devices or calendars. If its hot, its summer. Cold, its winter. If its dark, then its night, if there’s light out... must be day. How hard can this be? Yet, they run their lives by a clock and calendar, and they NEVER get it right. How can humans possibly rule the free world if they need to look at a clock to tell whether its night or day?

The human woman stayed home today because apparently human visitors were suppose to come and fix the tv and the telephone (the telephone is an archaic device used for human communication). In the stupid human world, repair people only show up between certain hours, and the humans must be there when the repair people show up, or else they don’t get stuff fixed. Its like a lottery sorta, except the reward is getting the broken stuff fixed. They make these “appointments” and then sit around all day, dash to the door when they hear a vehicle drive by, then mumble obscenities when it isn’t the repair person. They do that all day. The don’t even like moving away from the door, for fear that the repair person will knock lightly and dash away. I don’t think the human woman went to the bathroom all day because she was waiting on two of those repair people.

Around noon, the human man came home because the human woman had to go see a vet about her hand. I do hope they clipped her nails and poked a thermometer up her butt like they do to us every year. The human man waited and waited and waited. Apparently they didn’t win the repair person lottery today. When the human woman came home in a horrible mood (I’m guessing she got the thermometer) she got on the communications device and started screaming at people. Something about having to take a full day off of work and nobody bothering to show up when they said they should. There was even more screaming and the word “reschedule” was mentioned, which caused her to shriek even louder and keen.

So, the humans have calendars and time pieces, and yet apparently repair calendars and time pieces are different and secret. From what I understand, “We’ll be out Thursday” means “We may be out thursday, but probably not”

Now that I understand this concept, the next HULA take over attempt will include the following:

Every husky (and dog and fu-fu) will pretend to call their humans and tell them that someone will be out to repair their tv on a certain day between the human hours of 8 and 5. We feel that the tv is a vital device to the humans (despite the stupidity it plays) and they’ll do anything to make it work. While all of the humans are sitting in their houses, dashing to the window at the sound of every car... we’ll be free to do whatever we want in the world, which includes taking it over for Husky domination.

Now, all I have to do is correlate what 20 March is in doggie moon time and we’ll be all set.

Meeshka
(March 8th? We meant the year 2010!)

Comments

  1. Yeah, and to comfuse their clocks and calendars even more they have some kind of time that saves light? What kind of wierdness is that? It just means we have to wait longer for dinner on Sunday.

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  2. Anonymous9:49 AM

    Meeshka - you are exactly right! I know when it is morning and when it is night. Like this morning, for example, the sun came up, so at 6:30, I woke up the humans! Simple. Why do they need the alarm clock to sound off? I did just fine getting them up before that loud thing went off!
    Hugs, Sitka

    P.S. - I emailed in my HULA application. Did you get it via email??

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  3. Anonymous9:49 AM

    Meeshka - you are exactly right! I know when it is morning and when it is night. Like this morning, for example, the sun came up, so at 6:30, I woke up the humans! Simple. Why do they need the alarm clock to sound off? I did just fine getting them up before that loud thing went off!
    Hugs, Sitka

    P.S. - I emailed in my HULA application. Did you get it via email??

    ReplyDelete
  4. Anonymous9:49 AM

    Sorry for the duplicate post - I double clicked one time woo many!!!

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  5. Good plan Meeshka!
    We'll be ready.....

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  6. Hmm..you are so right Meeshka! Hoomans always make appointments and "try" to be on time but at the end of it, they always end up late. And when someone calls to rush them, they say I'm on my way when they are at HOME? Huh? Beats me...

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