I'm sure its never occurred to humans how dogs, no matter how much light, manage to run through a yard and not step in any poo, whereas humans managed to ALWAYS step in poo.
First of all, when you live with a lazy human woman who NEVER scoops the yard, despite her high tech poo scooper that makes scooping poo easy and clean, believe me, you develop a plan for pooing that involves only pooing in low traffic areas, plotting paths, and enforcing the claw when one of your gimpy co-horts violates the rule and leaves a tasty little package where it isn't suppose to be.
Coupled with our ultra high tech sensors such as 7 miles of nose buds that can smell poo (and tasty dead things to roll in) from miles away, and a keen sense of eyesight that rivals that bogus 6 million dollar man guy, we are perfectly capable of avoiding the most nasty of things no matter the lighting...
So, early this morning, despite the fact its one of those days where the human woman claims she is able to sleep in and not feed us or give us treats, or whatever and can lounge in my bed for hours and hours, we got her lazy butt up so we could pee and I needed to poo. Its dark, but per our poo arrangement, I am able to easily navigate the minefield of the back yard and do my "business" and navigate back to the house, expecting my breakfast.
Mutatoe, who continues to be a suck up wannabe, ran over to where I had been and...
He's all sorts of upset now because the human woman now calls him the "Pootatoe". I think that name is going to stick... pun intended.
Saturday, September 25, 2010
Saturday, September 11, 2010
I find that humans are so gullible that they are most likely breaking limbs getting to their phones to order a zillion of these things when all they really have to do is tell people that annoy them to shut up (as we pups have all learned from Master Tubey, high priest of dispelling stupidity), thus dispelling all negative energy from their lives, along with stocking up on tasty ice cream.
So, now that I've just taught you humans how to dispel negative energy, wouldn't you rather spend your money on something that will make you irresistible and loved? Wouldn't you rather have people greet you with open arms and invite you to places? Wouldn't you rather be the life of the party? Screw negative energy and balance, you want to have everyone to love you!
A must have for people with no social skills or friends, put on the iPopular and feel the love as people point at you in awe and respect.
Be warned, your popularity from the moment you put the iPopular will grow so quickly that it could be a bit overwhelming, so until you are use to its powerful ability to draw friends to you, you'll want to wear some sensible shoes.
iPopular, exclusively from MeeshCO, where quality is... quality.