Saturday, August 11, 2007

My Near Death Experience (ok, not really but it was scary)

I had planned on catching up on things this past week, because believe it or not, a LOT of things happened other than the human woman trial fiasco that involved ME!

Its nice and cool out, so I demanded the human woman let me out so I could lay in the shade and collect my thoughts before blogging and there was a very tasty stick laying there and I thought “its a stick... its tasty, I’ll chew on it”.

Next thing you know, that stick attacked me and jammed itself on the roof of my mouth! I couldn’t believe it, and it hurt! I pawed at my mouth and the stick didn’t come out, I rubbed my face in the dirt and the stick wouldn’t come out, I tried rolling around in the dirt and pawing at my mouth and the stick wouldn’t come out.

The suck-up gimpy mutatoe was out there with me and he saw me rolling around and in obvious distress and started yelling at me to paw harder or let him reach in with his mutatoe to get it out, he was frantic.

Spineless Bionic Hip Puppy Sam heard the commotion from inside and alerted the human woman, who then heard mutatoe barking, saw me rolling around and ran out, reached into my mouth and grabbed the nasty stick out of my mouth. She thought I was choking on something and was frantic too. Everyone was frantic, its a frantic day.

Once the stick was out, I had to pee, that was scary. The human woman brought me inside and she and the human man took me into the bathroom (where every medical exam on us takes place) and checked out my mouth, which is kinda sore, but no worse for wear. When they were certain I was fine, they let me go get a drink of water, and since I was a bit messy from rolling in the yard, I washed all of my paws off in my water bowl, and the human woman didn’t even yell at me for that.

The human man pointed out that his family is scheduled to come visit. As some of you may know, whenever the human man’s family comes for a visit, really bizarre bad things tend to happen. I’ll be starting the annual “Celebrity Death Pool” in a week or so. No prizes, just fun in guessing which random celebrity will die when Uncle Jack arrives. Last year’s “winner” was Steve Irwin. This would also explain why the human’s attic fan (that died and was replaced last year during Uncle Jack’s visit) suddenly tried to eat itself and die last night. If it ain’t one thing....

(sticks can be hazardous to your health)


Tucker said...

Meeshka, try not to be a PITA to your human mom right now, okay? ;)

cyber-sibes said...

Holy Huskies! That was really scarey, Meeshka! My heart started racing as I read your blog! At least I can let out a wooooo of relief, and you are alright. I'm glad you didn't end up being tortured by the vet.
Already time for another Uncle Jack visit? Well, at least it'll keep things interesting.

Wooos, Star
(my report from my adventure, on my blog now )

Holly said...

Ouch!! That terrible stick was so mean to attack you when all you wanted to do was snack on it! I am glad you are ok. I hope you got lots of treats!

I'll start thinking which celebrity I will vote for!


Dakota said...

Oh my!
Those sticks have been particularly nasty this year.

Sitka and Tia's BLAWG! said...

Oh what a BAD stick. Thank dog that the gimpy dogs were there to alert your mom!

JustMeCopper said...

I'm not sure why rolling in the dirt didn't help get the stick out. It seemed like a great idea!

Kapp pack said...

So glad you're ok. I don't know what I would do without your humor at the end of a long day!

-Kelsey Ann

Tasha & Eva said...

We're glad that you're OK. Since Momma read this, we'll have to stop running with sticks for a while.


(And Momma loves your editorial above)