Yet Another Lousy Human Woman Idea

I really don't know what gets into the human woman's head sometimes. She sees these things on tv or finds them on the internet and thinks they're perfect and buys them. She could spend her money on us, buying us goodies and treats, and perhaps a bigger bed, but no, she buys these things "for us" like brushes and stupid heartworm pills (that claim to be tasty beef flavor, but I'm here to tell you that they taste as much like beef as a shoe).

Here is the latest "fantasy" thing for us:
Its a thing called a Peticure. Now at least its not the knock-off piece of crap they're advertising on the "as seen on tv" infomercials that go on and on about how wonderful their knock-off product is because its not as expensive as the real one, and only costs you $29.99 but if you call now it'll only cost you two payments of $15.00 (if you're too stupid to add that up...) and if you call now, they'll throw in the free "shed ender" a $30.00 value for free, you just have to pay shipping and handling (which amazingly enough adds up to $30.00) and then you sit for a year and your order never arrives so you call the company and they've gone out of business and are now selling Ped-eggs.

Its all the Mutatoe's fault because last night as he was hogging most of the bed, the Human Woman was massaging his back feet (the spoiled little suck up) and she noticed that his back nails are long enough to scale trees like those tree trimmer guys. She got out a nail file and started sawing away at them to no avail. It was then that I could see the lightbulb go off in her relatively dim head. If Loki sits still for a nail file, then why not spend gobs of money on a thing that will file them like a dremel, but has a guard on it to keep it from sucking up our sensitive foot hairs and causing pain and suffering... so she ordered one. Grand. I'll be sure to include pictures of the carnage when she tries using it on us.

I also wanted to add that she got a hair cut and she's all proud of it. Here it is:
Yes, its the exact same hair cut she gets all the time, but please, just humor her and tell her how wonderful and new it looks. If you don't, she may go out and squander our money on a new bag or something stupid "for us" like that automatic dog washer thing she saw on the Animal Planet Puppy Games last night.

I just wanted to mention that one of the puppies on that show was named ZIM!!!! I know a ZIM!!! Of course, the athlete Zim looked nothing like the Zim I know, but still, its pretty cool.



  1. Wowzers! I've never met anypuppy else named Zim! He looks like a little Joe Stains! How cool!
    This will come as no surprise to you, but my mom was tempted to get one of those things, too. Please be sure to let us know what you pups think. You know the rules - if you have one, we need one. And vice versa.
    Play bows,

  2. When will they give up on all this crap! Yeah, I guess the haircut looks ok....

    Kisses, Sky boy

  3. Yes, just humour her - it is what WE have to do -

    Otherwise they take away the 'puter thingie and food yummi's - I mean, imagine a life without oyster khrakhkers?

    I kept thinking the same thing last night evfurrytime I heard Zim -

    He was so NOT Zim!

    Khyra (and Merdie)
    PeeEssWoo: so she got her hairs khut - whoopedueffin' 'do'

  4. Hi Schmoo!

    And Zim was a BT - like me!!

  5. Harrrrrrr Meeshka
    Yer mom didnt get a dremel with a sanding band and put yer foot in an old panty hose to keep the fur out of it Harrrrrrr. Yer Mom sould have talked to D'azul first Harrrrrrr.
    Cap'n Maverick the Pirate

  6. Oh no! My mum has started with the same tradition as the Ao4's mum of getting what your human woman has. Now I'll have to get my nails clipped too! Waaaaaahhhhhh!!!!!

    And we tried to watch the puppy games on Animal Planet so I could see my best friend Zimmie but they must think people in Australia aren't interested. Hmph.

    Huffle Mawson, Honorary Husky and Explorer Cat

  7. WOO WOO Meeshka

    Peticure! No way - We hate it when Mom does anything with our feet. We think our Moms should turn the TV off and spend more time loving on us !

    Thor and Marco Polo

  8. My Mom has considered buying one of those nail trimmer things. Let us know if it works well.

  9. Oh good grief, not yours too? Our humom has been toying with getting one of those Peticure thingies. Now she'll be glued to your blog waiting to hear about how great it is. (which she will interpret in direct proportion to your displeasure) It's a SMS conspiracy.

    wooos & a-rooos
    Star & Jack

    oh yeah, "Nice haircut , Mrs. Meeshka's Mom"

  10. *news flash* tell your humans to read this before spending their money on the peticure:

  11. I want to see pictures of the carnage! I have ever-so-nice-long claws because "there will be blood" if anyone goes for my toes!!
    - Charlie

  12. That Peticure looks like a nice chew toy!!!

    Woooo woo rar rar rar,
    Kayla and Maebe

  13. Human Woman: Your hair looks fantastic. It's so different and lovely. I bet the Human Man definitely noticed and commented.

    Meeshka: My mom wants a blower now. Just because the groomer used one and got rid of my zebra stripes, now a blower is the magical invention. Why are humans so impressionable? They want everything they see.


  14. Anonymous4:12 PM

    Hey, Meeshka! This is Zim's (from the Puppy Games) owner.

    Our Zim is actually a female, although the people on TV repeatedly called her a "him". Silly humans.

    Her real / full name is "Mr. Hakizimana". We named her after a friend from Burundi.


Post a Comment