Sunday, April 23, 2006

Visitor and fun in the yard

The humans had a visitor over on Saturday (they wouldn't let us play with him, but we smelled him after he left). Apparently the visitor left a small wooden box that the humans placed on the upstairs table along with another small wooden box. Apparently, that's Nova and Nikki. They don't smell like huskies though.

With the entrance of the small wooden box, the humans seem to be getting more back to normal, so we've decided that its time to be evil again. This whole moping around was depressing, so I've been ultra cute and fluffy lately, doing a lot of woo'ing and stomping of my delicate feet for things I deserve. The human woman is spending a lot more time outside watching us play, which is really fun. They've also cleaned up the yard for us, and its about time. What little grass that's left was really tall and tickled my delicate po-po when I went to the bathroom. Now I can go without that annoyance.

We spent a lot of time outside with them today as they "cleaned" the yard. We helped them rake the old leaves by jumping into the neat little piles of them and spreading them throughout the yard again. We also ran and ran when they told us we had to go inside so they could use the power tools. Loki didn't want to go in, so we had to chase him around for a while. I finally convinced him with a head slam to the ground that he needed to go in. I swear, that puppy has no brains.

While the human man was spreading something they think will make grass grow, we got to stand on the deck and watch him. I like the deck, its really high and I can see my kingdom and woo at the neighbor yappy dogs. I like that we get to go out on it more. Nova didn't like the deck, and about a month ago he actually fell down the stairs, which freaked the humans out, even though he casually slid down the stairs. After that, no deck for anyone but the humans. Now we go out on it a lot, and Sam and Loki have learned that its a no pee zone.

The house is getting cleaned some more, pretty soon it'll just smell like us again. That's kinda sad that it won't have the Nova smell anymore, except the humans haven't touched the big cushy pillow. Maybe they'll just leave that alone and we'll be able to roll on it and remember the old guy-guy.

Pretty down tired after a rough day of beating up on spoiled gimpy dogs.

Thursday, April 20, 2006

Gosh Its Dull Around Here

Since the old guy-guy went away, its been really dull around here. I tried to liven things up a bit by running into one of the deck supports and screaming shrilly as if I were dying. That really freaked the human woman out, and I have to admit... it did hurt, but she was so freaked out by it that I just skittered into the house when she told everyone to go inside and waited for her at the top of the stairs. She didn't seem happy that I was ok, more shook up. I can't win.

We've all had upset stomachs too, including the humans apparently, and Loki (the suck up) has taken over the old guy-guy's sleepy spot behind the human woman's chair. We can all sleep in the middle of the floor now because he's not tripping and stomping on us. Its not as exciting.

The house is starting to smell ... clean. Sam is doing his best to mark all of the old guy-guy spots to keep his memory alive, but the humans yell at him and take him outside. They don't appreciate our attempts to memorialize him. Loki (ever the suck up) curled up on the old guy-guy's cushy pillow and that sent the human woman into tears. I swear, there's very little we can do without sending one or the other into a crying fit.

Look at me, I'm cute and fluffy... ok... dammit, stop crying.

Woo wooo, stomp my tiny little feet... wait a minute... why are you crying now?

Claw, claw, claw.... ok, this is ridiculous, stop that crying crap.

We have managed to milk some good treats out of them. Steak bits, for example... which gave us diarrhea, but dang it was tasty. We're also getting leftover foods from the old guy-guy... once again, not agreeing with our stomachs. The human woman did throw away the poo goo that he was getting to help him poo easier... and cried about it. She put away the scale she used to measure out our raw meat that we got for a while... so much for getting that ever again.

They were lamenting about the stinky wipes they bought for him and never used on him... I'm guessing they'll attack us with those next, just to use them. I'll smell like a freakin flower.

Don't get me wrong, I miss him a lot... its very dull around here without him... just wish they'd stop moping around.

Think I'll go pee someplace and watch the human woman cry when she steps in it.

Monday, April 17, 2006

Thank you all

I just wanted to post a quick thank you to everyone on the passing of old guy-guy Nova.

Its been very quiet around here the past few days. The humans are very sad, so we've been playing nice, and not sitting on their heads or doing bad things. I've been trying to do cute and fluffy things to make the human woman laugh or even smile. Loki wallowed on the human man and cuddled with him to make him feel better.

We all have upset stomachs now, and sleep in. Sammy will woo when he needs to go out in the morning, I just don't have the heart to claw the human woman to get her up.

We all knew he was in a bad way this weekend. Loki layed beside him and licked his nose to tell him it was ok. He may be a suck up, but he was a comfort to the old guy-guy. We hovered around him when he cried out and tried to help him and tell him we were there for him.

We said our good-byes, and the humans took him in the truck. They told us that he was in a good place, with no pain, running free with other pups. We're still sad. There's no bowl to lick, Sammy doesn't have anyone to argue with after dinner anymore, we can lay where we want without him stepping on us, we can sleep all night without having to get up and help him go out and pee.

This afternoon, the human woman happened to look behind the couch and found a spot where he poo'd. He hated having to poo in the house and would try to hide it. She cried as she cleaned it up, so I let her hug me.

Someday I'll tell you more about him, but right now, I'm going to curl up on the bed and sigh.


Saturday, April 15, 2006

Thursday, April 13, 2006

Shhh, don't tell the human woman where I'm at

The human woman left the door to the room we're not allowed in open, so I walked on in. The door was open, so why not.

I pretended like I belonged in there, so she couldn't see me. I walked over to the bed and sat down. Since I was still invisible, I was able to skitter under the bed and hide completely. hehehe.

She only figured it out because there's not a lot of room under there, and I was making the bed bounce a little as I wormed my way deeper under the bed. Its a nice hidey hole.

She wanted me to come out.


Come out!




Then she played a dirty trick on me. She made the oven timer go off, which meant food was coming out of it. I had to go supervise that, so I came out. Of course, they didn't share any of it with us, so I should have just stayed under the bed.


Sunday, April 09, 2006

Blog Security Hasn't Been Breached

I just wanted to assure every husky that the human woman hasn't cracked my password and blogged a false post from me. I also wanted to assure everyone that I'm just as cute and fluffy as ever... now just softer.

The evil furminator cannot penetrate my fluffiness, but it does bring out the red in my fluffy coat, and it does make my fluffiness even softer than before. I'm still amply fluffy, it just got rid of some of the undercoat. It also doesn't hurt like the other evil brushes, its like you were being petted, which is a good thing. The human woman spent a lot of time with me, massaging my fur, bowing to my needs, following me around like a good human woman, so I was able to manipulate her, while she thought she was manipulating me. I'll allow her to think that for now.

She did get me outside with the thing, which wasn't as pleasant as it was inside, mainly because I was in the middle of a nap and stalking of a bird that was trying to build a nest up on the deck we never get to go on anymore. I was concentrating so hard on the little bird, willing it to fall to the ground close to me so that I wouldn't have to strain myself with getting up and chasing it, and she came out with the furminator thing. Ok, fine, comb me if you want, but after a while I got tired of it, and scampered away. She followed, I scampered, she followed, I scampered, she gave up, I won.

I will pick the time and day that she will be allowed to use it on me, and only when I feel that my fluff needs to be combed all soft again. Another added bonus is that now that I'm soft and fluffy, the human woman can't resist my soft and fluffy, so she's been petting and scratching me a lot, which is a good thing.

It was nice out today also. Not too hot, not too cold, just right. We spent some time outside, and I was able to snag the mutant toed puppy in mid-air and slam him to the ground. So, overall, a very good day when that happens, and I barely had to move to do it. He's such a dork.

If only you could feel how soft I am now!

Saturday, April 08, 2006

She Went And Got One

Yes, the human woman went out and got a Furminator. She came home all depressed because it was raining and we got wet, and apparently humans can't use it on you when you are wet... so find adequate sources of water to stay damp all the time!

She waited. Yes, she's patient that way, until we were all dry. She tried it on the mutant toed gimpy Loki first. He's such a suck up, he just sits there and lets her do all sorts of things to him and never flinches. I'm waiting for her to start dressing him up in the human clothes and taking pictures, and he'd just sit there like the suck up adopted dog he is.

Then she tried it on Sam. I was confident that Sam would come through for the team. He hates to be combed, especially around his bionic hip. He screams and jerks around like you're killing him when the brush comes out, and that's even before the brush touches him.

That traitorous suck up just layed there. I couldn't believe it when he actually stretched out so she could brush him on the bionic hip! The fur was really flying now, all over the place, that thing just rips the fluffiness right out of you! I thought for sure there would be screaming agony, pain and suffering, fluffiness ripped from our very souls.

Then, the human woman took the rest of the pack outside because she knows I get very cranky and surely when I'm combed. She let me sniff the evil thing. I wanted to rip it from her hand and destroy it, but I wanted to wait until she started in with that thing first, give me a reason to be mad when it ripped the fluffiness... hey!

It doesn't hurt like those other combs. It actually feels kinda nice. I sat there for a moment, allowing the human woman to feel victory as she ripped the fluffiness from me... then I got on the couch because that was softer, and actually the whole brushing thing felt pretty good. I really didn't feel the need to chew on her arm or anything because it was just like she was petting me, sorta theraputic actually.

So I'm a bit too fluffy maybe, and actually I've been feeling a bit warm with all the fluffiness I have to carry around. I let her comb out about a garbage bag full of hair before I needed to go pee, so I huffed off. Frankly... its not horrible at all, and she said I also feel a lot softer.

Fluffy AND soft. I kinda like that, so I guess I'll allow her to do it some more later on.

Sometimes you can be too fluffy I guess.

Friday, April 07, 2006

It's a Conspiracy!!!

Today I happened to be checking the human woman's e-mail while she was out cleaning up some mess that Sam, Loki, or Nova made and what do I see??????


Can you belive that??? The whole world is conspiring to rob me of my fluffiness!!!!

The add says: Reduce pet shedding up to 90% it also says: "The stainless steel edge deShedding Tool does not cut hair, it just gently pulls out the fluffy undercoat, leaving the topcoat shiny and undamaged. Leaves coat shiny and shed-free."

Gently PULLS????? How about if I gently pull out your hair? Would you like that human woman???


This is too much. I thought the Kong crack whiz treat that made every dog that tasted it into obediant robots that did whatever the humans told them to do was bad, but now they're designing comb things that rip out our fluffy undercoats! I NEED my fluffy undercoat to maintain maximum fluffability! How can I be cute and fluffy without my fluffy undercoat!!!!

I'll freeze to death in this crappy Maryland weather without my fluffy undercoat! Water will soak to my skin without my fluffy undercoat!

I will not be the cutest, fluffiest husky in the world without my fluffy undercoat!!!

I can only hope that all of the stupid humans that believe this slick marketing ploy will race out and buy them, so there's no more by the time the human woman hauls her lazy butt out of MY bed, gets dressed and goes out to get one!

Save me from the furminator! Sacrifice your own fluffy undercoat to save mine and tell your human to go buy one (then destroy it immediately).

Meeshka... who may not be fluffy for long

Beware the new gadgets!

Hello every husky,

The humans, once again, have been very busy this week. Their stress level is at a peak with something called a "bill", but it doesn't seem to be like the kind they have to pay, more like a thing that if it gets passed, then people have to do certain things a certain way or else they have to pay or go to jail.

They left for a whole day sorta, leaving us languishing in our crates for 2 hours longer than normal, and came back all worn out. They've been so obsessed with this "bill" thing for a week, but now they are starting to pay attention to us again (and its about time), but in a bad way.

The human woman announced again that I needed a bath, and that my fluffiness was getting matted. She pronounced just last night after itching my leg (in the wrong spot, of course) that I needed the Furminator.

I have no idea what this Furminator is, but apparently she's heard about it from some other humans on that evil list she reads. I've tried to delete the list, tried to unsubscribe her from the list, but she catches on and resubscribes and reads all of that nonsense that other evil husky owners write on there about grooming and bathing.

Apparently this Furminator will remove all of my extra fluffiness, and I will love having my extra fluffiness removed. Riiiight. She claims that I will love the Furminator, and will allow her to remove my fluffiness with it, and not chew on her arm while she does it. Riiiight.

First was the comb. I don't like the comb, it hurts.

Next came the slicker brush. Don't like that either, so I chew on the human woman's arm to tell her that I don't like it.

Then she bought another type of comb with long teeth, and started giving me rawhides to chew on instead of her arm. I'd finish the rawhide and chew on her arm.

She bought some kind of loop thing, and even with a rawhide I refused to let her come near me with it, so she tried chasing me around the house, but gave up after I crawled into my crate with the rawhide.

Then she bought some kind of rubber looking brush, which was fun to chew and destroy and didn't do anything to remove my fluffiness.

Now she's talking Furminator, which apparently is some sort of expensive miracle anti-fluffy device. She showed me a picture of what it does. Some poor husky (no doubt sedated, or bribed with the kong crack whiz) laying among a huge pile of fur. The husky did not look fluffy. The fur around the husky sure did look fluffy, but it was on the floor. What good is fluffy if its on the floor?

She's threatening to buy this Furminator this weekend and try it out on me outside. That should be interesting, because there are so many places for me to run and hide out there. I particularly like under the deck stairs, because she can't get me there.

I can already tell what will happen. She will succeed in only getting one side of fluffiness from me. I will maintain one side of fluffiness, she will be unhappy that I'm uneven, there will be a battle to remove both sides of fluffy, and I will win. I will post pictures of my one side of fluffy for everyone to prove that I will win and keep one side of fluffy.

She's definitely not getting near my po-po with that thing!

Furminator Shmurminator