Tuesday, September 29, 2009

My 1,000th Post

I'm guessing that all of you were expecting something wondrous and fantastical and amazing and clever and worthy of the Queen of the World.

Well, this is it:

The Spineless Bionic Hip Puppy is now the Spineless Bionic Hip and Knee Puppy, and he's home from having his new bionic implant inserted and he's resting.

Happiness is having your pack back together even if that means he gets to sleep on the aerobed with his own human and get special foods and attention and we're stuck upstairs and have to go to the yard via the deck to pee.

Get well soon Sammy


Sunday, September 20, 2009

Time Flies (Post 999)

Wow, time really does fly when you don't wear a watch.

Uncle Jack came and went, and frankly we're very disappointed that there were no horrible catastrophes or celebrity deaths, except for Patrick Swayze, and that was after Uncle Jack left.

We aren't even counting the Water Heater death on him, nor are we blaming Spineless Bionic Hip pup Sam now limping because he was running outside one minute, then he yipped and now he's limping. Between the water heater and Sam, we're pretty sure the human woman will be keening and rocking back and forth about the bills to fix both of them.

The fun thing is that they humans have been without hot water for the past 3 days and its getting nice and stinky in the house. Between the dirty dishes, the dirty clothes and the dirty humans, we're liking this whole gone to nature smell around the house. No flowers, no sickening sweet smells, its really started to smell like a true husky house. Apparently those tasty smells will come to an end tomorrow after noon as soon as an organ or two is sold to repair the problem... then its off to the vet for Sam for another cash for clunker dogs deal. The human woman is ready to get him a cart and a bubble wrap coat.

Pretty much all I've been doing lately is:

Does this air vent make my butt look fat?


Monday, September 07, 2009

Catch up to Today (post 998)

For those of you actually keeping track, I'm only two (after this) posts away from 1,000. I have no idea how I'll celebrate my 1,000th post, if anyone has any ideas that doesn't require me to actually DO anything strenuous, let me know.

Its been a rough patch of blogging lately, what with the malfunctioning human woman. I wish she was still under warranty or maybe I could have traded her in under some lemon law, but I keep duct taping her back together and she seems to function well for a while before more duct tape is needed. The latest was her contracting some kind of pig issue. She says it was just a cold, but nobody has "just a cold" this time of year, so I'm guessing she's contaminated half of Merryland with her swine flu thing. Of course she's better now, but who knows how many lives she's ruined with her snot contamination tour.

The best part of the illness was having the human woman modeling her new stylish "hello kitty" motorcycle helmet for us with a cold. Yeah, like we didn't expect this at all.

Uncle Jack arrived Saturday night, and as usual we made sure there was 5 minutes of frenzied greeting (along with a well placed paw punch) and then back to business as usual. Sunday was very exciting because they had some of the "gnomes in my pants" game players over for a cookout. We kinda figured that the "gnomes in my pants game players were merely the delusional voices of the human man, but it turns out they are real people... and fun to claw as well. I made sure that I was presentable to the company by rolling in a very stinky dead thing prior to meeting them. Unfortunately the human woman caught me before I could make my grand entrance and wiped me down with wet towels and some stinky towelette things. I managed one good eye torpedo before the day was over.

So, the pretty much brings us to today. The humans are still using abundant kleenex treats, bonus for me, and its kinda crappy outside so I think today is going to be lounging, napping, eating, pay attention to me, feed me, all about me day... and perhaps a celebrity will die... still waiting on that one.