Monday, June 20, 2022

Long Weekends

 Bleeder and Toast have been home for a long weekend because of a holiday and I'm all for more holidays if it means playing, skittering, getting tasty things in my kong bone, and spending time with them.

It has been SO HOT that I haven't been able to go on many walks. Something about the cement being too hot for my sensitive little feety feets. Early morning play sessions in the yard have to do until the weather takes a turn, which it finally did on Saturday and Sunday.

It is so hot here that we now have lizards. Well, something called a skink. I found one in the yard and gave it a good chase until Bleeder shooed me away and released it back into the wild over the fence. By the way, our other neighbor found the big rat snake she released the other day. He seemed appreciative.

This is NOT the actual skink, just one some guy took a picture of (see credit)

On Saturday we all got up, I put on my walk finery and we went for a car ride.

I love the perfectly placed cool air vent on my Tesla

Will there be Puppacino at our destination?

Of course it wasn't a National Park, just a parking lot of my vet place. Apparently Bleeder has been bleeding a lot, and since I won't let them touch my toes without drama... and blood, I was going to get a pawdicure.

I got to walk and do a lot of sniffing in the parking lot while we waited for my appointment, which didn't take long. I may have gained a bit of weight, but you can still see my curvy waist. I'm just tall and leggy and dense.

My manicurist at Countryside Vet Clinic escorted me to the back and did a wonderful job with my nails. There was no screaming. I got plenty of loving and good care, as usual. 

Then we went back home where I got to sniff my pee mail box and other parts of the neighborhood.


Then there was cheese and crackers.

I see you are eating cheese and crackers...

The supply chain of cheese and crackers is a bit slow

Some outside relaxation under the deck after a rousing game of chase the balls and wheel.

What? I'm not doing anything

Then I came inside and found some comfortable napping positions. This one is good for the neck muscles.


Then I found a much more comfortable pillow, which then complained about having to sit still on the floor so long, her butt fell asleep. 



So, it's been a very nice weekend. I'm told there will be another really soon, and I'm looking forward to that. I was also told there will probably be fireworks, which I like to watch from the deck.

Sunday, June 12, 2022

Wild Things

 It was non-stop action here at my house last week. What a week. What an exciting week!

I'm not even being sarcastic about it, it was a week!

Spring is here and there are exciting woodland creatures visiting! No, not just the boring bees that I'm not allowed to play with or eat, or the worms, that apparently I'm not supposed to roll in, but more fun things... squeaky toy things, like the baby bird!

Bleeder told me about fledgling season and apparently that's really a thing, unlike all of her other lies like "if you claw me one more time my arm will fall off". That's such an exaggeration because clearly all of those band-aids will keep that arm on your body.

To Bleeder gets home from work on Thursday and she takes me out for our usual after work play/claw/leap/eat things session and my after work poop. I poop, and Bleeder is all "hey, let's go inside and get a cookie". Well, who doesn't want a cookie, and although it's weird that she didn't play our usual throw 50 balls until I decide which one I'll chase game, I ran inside. She got me a cookie, then ran outside again and shut the door so I couldn't get out.

What the fluff is that all about.

APPARENTLY there was one of those fledgling things on the evil tunnel thing in the back yard. Just sitting there. Innocent, unable to fly... tasty. She called it a "blue jay", and baby blue jay's parents were NOT happy at all and proceeded to scream and attack Bleeder if she got near their baby. 

Bleeder (and Toast) are pushovers when it comes to animals, especially gimpy dogs, so she had to make a decision on where to "rehome" the baby jay. The general rule of all woodland creatures that trespass is they go over the fence. Typically they go over the fence at the gate area. There are no predators so they have a decent chance of going someplace else... NOT in the back yard.

She doubted she could grab it, then make a dash toward the front yard area without getting a blue jay beak to the face. To the right are the yappie dogs... nope. Directly behind is an in ground pool... nope. To the left is 3 dogs... nope. To the left rear is one tiny teacup yorkie that is afraid of everything. Yep.

So acting nonchalantly, Bleeder saunters up to the baby jay, snags it and makes a run to the left rear corner and flings it over the fence and into their bushes while angry Blue Jays swoop and scream.

The only thing I got to do was sniff and roll in the large amount of baby blue jay poop that was left from the adventure.

Friday rolls around and it's mowing day, which I'm not allowed outside during that stuff. Bleeder throws the tarp off the mower and unscrews the gas cap to put gas in and why looky there... a freshly fed juvenile rat snake is taking a nap on the lawnmower deck. 

She gently removed that with the pooper scooper, but it really wasn't in the mood for a ride, so it took a few scoops and attempts to gently fling it over the gate.

I did get to sniff the areas where it jumped out, got scooped up, and finally flung.

Fast forward to Saturday, and I did my usual Saturday squirrel stalk.


Then I mosied over to the other side of the back yard near the stupid blue jay poop covered vinyl tunnel thing and WHOA! What the heck is that long pull toy!

3-4 foot rat snake danger noodle or nope rope

Even better, this pull toy moves on it's own and OHMERGERD this pull toy just looked at me and I'm not really sure about this whole thing.

Bleeder sprinted off the deck without even knowing what was down there because she knows that look. That look of "This is probably going to be a bad idea, but I think I'm gonna go in" and stopped me... just in the nick of time because I would have kicked that snake's butt... no, I wasn't at all afraid of it, nor did I run to Bleeder and hide behind her. Nope that didn't happen.

She asked if I'd rather have a cookie, and of course I did, and she took me by the collar and we went inside, then she went out again and did this with the patent pending danger noodle removal tool that also picks up trash. Right into the front yard with the little one.


When the coast was clear, and I finished my cookie, I went out and gave that whole area a VERY thorough sniffing, but I was still very cautious because eeeeesh, that thing was huge. They also smell bad. 

The rest of the day was spent inspecting that area in case it came back, and eating goodies out of my Kong bone, but the adult kong bone is much more difficult than the little pink puppy bone, so there's a lot of this going on.





Sunday, June 05, 2022

But I'm Just a Baby!

 One of the things I've discovered recently is this whole unfair business of "getting older". Apparently I'm now considered an adult. I don't like this adult stuff, and I can totally see why Toast and Bleeder are angry all the time. Doing "adult" things is really hard.

I'm supposed to behave now. What is up with that? Nobody told me this was coming. A little warning would have been nice.

I'm not supposed to stomp on them any more. Something about it being cute and adorable when I was a smol pile of floof, but now that I weigh a bit more, standing on them seems to be out of the question, although I do it every morning anyway because I have to pee, they need to get up, I don't care if their alarm says they have 30 more minutes, my bladder does not.

They won't help me do things because they insist I have to learn how to do it myself. As if my lack of opposable thumbs doesn't come into play when opening bags of treats, or jars of tasty things, or opening doors.

For instance. I've enjoyed my pink bone for quite some time. Bleeder shoves tasty treats into the holes and then I gnaw on it. When I was tiny, I needed help and explained this by flinging it at Bleeder's head. As I got older, Bleeder would refuse to help me, explaining that I was a big girl now and needed to learn how to do it myself.

FINE! So I did. She was right, I wasn't working as hard as I should have been, so I decided to be the best "remove treats from my pink bone in the fastest time possible so Bleeder had to restuff it, therefore more treats for me" husky. I was killing it! That 15 minutes of solitude for Bleeder turned into 10, then 5, then almost immediate. I liked this gig. Treats, and treats, and treats. Even her stuffing it with cheese sticks, I sucked that cheese out in no time.

So, what happens? Not more treats, that's for sure... big red bone came into the house.


Granted, more treats fit into big red bone, but it's virtually IMPOSSIBLE to get them out without assistance! I mean what in the ever loving woo is this crap trick?

Yes, I'm trying to get them out by myself, but there comes a point where it can't be done. I'm not some gigantic bone crushing beast that can chomp down on this and squeeze the goodies out. I'm a delicate little flower of a husky. To make things worse, I'm gated off from the stairs so I can't fling it down to dislodge the goodies like my predecessor Meeshka used to do. This is foul!

The one bright side is that if I get a good head sling going, I can launch that thing straight at Bleeder and get her attention quickly to communicate that I'd like a bit of help.


Stupid chair
Lately it's been ghastly hot here and I'm NOT in the mood to run around the yard and get my steps in. My Fi collar tracks my steps and I have a quota (like a sweatshop around here, literally), so the other day I went on strike and demanded to stay indoors and broke my 216 day step streak. Toast and Bleeder were WAY more disappointed than I was, so now I'm back to a 2-day streak.

It's been a bit cooler out, but still too hot for me. I'm blowing my winter coat, so it's like wearing a winter coat in the summer, leave me alone I'll be on the air vent. Chase a ball? Absolutely not. I will play ring toss in the house though for maybe 2 throws and after that, I'm done.

So there's a lot of this


Some of this


And because there is an annoying salesperson that seems intent on getting Toast and Bleeder to come to the door (they have a hard/fast rule: if you aren't expected, you can knock until you die, nobody opens the door, even if you are literally dying on their porch), there is some of this... mainly because I'm watching you out there, and also because there's an air vent on that side of the couch.


Every once in a while I do like to go sundogging on the deck, only because when you come back inside it seems even cooler.


I'd like to point out that this is also 2 Sundays in a row where pancakes have not occured and I'm filing a grievance.