Monday, February 23, 2009

Mango and Dexter

I’m glad that you are ok and your humans too.

I tried to leave a comment on your blog, but it wouldn’t let me (stupid blogger).


Saturday, February 21, 2009

Join the Cause

FINALLY an award I can get behind.

Its common knowledge that squirrels are evil. They even drive cars.

Thanks to Magickal Tails for bestowing me with this award, I am honored to be on the Squirrel Patrol... happy eating.

Thursday, February 19, 2009

A call to Paws again

Bogart's human man is very sick and he and his human woman need our support, so go and comment some good vibes on his blog!

Sweet Spencer has crossed the Rainbow Bridge... go stick your cold noses on his blog and comfort his humans.

And now, am obligatory picture of me looking very fluffy.


Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Sunday, February 15, 2009

Mr. Shumer, We care

Hey, Chatty class who doesn't like pork... don't you want to just claw this pompous human?

I just wanted Mr. Shumer, that politician guy, to know that I've conducted a poll, and apparently we do care about pork. Not as much as beef, but its pretty much up there with beef, although I think the poll was skewed a bit as not enough cat population was included, otherwise I think that tuna would have been right up there with beef. Personally, I'm glad tuna didn't make it higher on the list, as the Mutatoe gets butt issues when he eats tuna and fish stuff.

So, here are the official results of the poll:

Tuesday, February 03, 2009

Seriously out of control

No, I'm not talking about the pimple on the human woman's face, although it is so disgusting I can barely look at her, I'm talking about the Mutatoe.

It seems that he didn't go "away" to rehab like I thought he would. I was looking forward to at least 28 days of non-ear piercing yapping and him hitting me with that... mutatoe. Oh no, he didn't go anywhere, apparently rehab consists of him not getting any socks... duh, there's a brilliant idea, glad I have such an intelligent human woman. Ok, I take that back, if she were any smarter then I probably wouldn't get all of those medicinal oyster crackers, but still, come on!

So last night I settled in for the night on my comfy human woman head pillow and drooled a little bit, just because I know how much she appreciated drool in her hair in the morning. As usual it gets a bit hot, as the human woman turns into raging furnace at night, and I did see a program on human spontaneous combustion that said that humans that get really hot at night are just flaming time bombs waiting to happen. For my own safety, when she starts cooking, I move onto the air vent, well away from the fire ball of death, should it occur. Right around midnight, she cools off and its back up on the human woman head pillow for me... except for last night.

Last night I was ready to move back up into my spot... but there was something there. At first I thought it was a giant bloated red pillow, but then it snored and I realized that it was THE MUTATOE! The Mutatoe had totally stolen my space on the bed! Normally he's at the foot of the bed with Spinless Bionic Hip Pup Sam, but tonight Sam had managed to sprawl the entire foot of the bed, leaving no room for Mutatoe. Like a good Mutatoe he should have just jumped down and slept on the crappy dog bed on the human man's side, but NOOOO, he just made himself right at home in MY spot and HE WOULDN'T GET UP!

I woo'd. I stomped my delicate little feety feet. I ran around the room woo'ing so it sounded like WoooOOOOOooooooOOOOOO! Nothing, no movement from either him or the human woman, who was using HIM as a pillow and drooling on HIM. To make matters even worse, even if he did get up, the Mutatoe drools like a garden hose. I have no idea why, but its so bad that when the Human Woman goes to bed before the human man, Mutatoe lays on the human man side and the human woman actually has to put a towel down under him so he doesn't soak the sheets. He's such a mutatoe! Even if he did get up, who wants to lay in Mutatoe drool covered sheets!?!!???

I'm certainly not happy with the way my house is being run lately, so there will be changes! Just because I felt like it, I totally attacked the Mutatoe when he tried to run up the stairs and slammed him to the floor and told him to stay out of my spot. He will respect my authority!


Monday, February 02, 2009

Try to make him go to rehab, I say Woo, Woo, Woo

Yes, its happened again. We thought he was cured after his last stint in rehab, but apparently he's had a relapse. He hid it well, the Human Woman doesn't know how long he's been hiding it, but she suspected something was up when she kept finding socks with no matching pair when she did laundry.

Yesterday she found one sock behind a door, another hidden in a corner, then she caught him red handed with one in his mouth as he was trying to slink out of the bathroom.

As of today, Loki is back at the Betty Ford clinic for cushy hoarders. He should be back after a few weeks, and this time we hope it takes, but the humans still can't find a few socks, so I think he's got them hidden for later.

In case you were wondering, the Human Woman is now complaining about a pimple on her face. She thinks nobody can see it, but here's my artist's rendition of it, judge for yourself.

Sunday, February 01, 2009

One more thing that's not amusing

This is the SECOND time that I was outside with the Mutatoe, he banged on the door to be let in, and she just locked me out, forgot all about me! No amount of banging and screaming got her attention, I had to sit out there and wait until she let the Mutatoe out again.

Thankfully he has a bladder the size of a thimble and has to be let out frequently, or else I could still be sitting out there!

No respect I tell you!