My Hobbies

The Working Breed

As most of you know, the Siberian Husky (of which I am one) is a "working breed".  Our job is to pull sleds, but... seriously?  Humans have cars, why should I pull a freakin sled?

I've re-invented the breed to include jobs such as:

• Snoopervision
• Staring
• Clawing
• Stomping
• Wooing
• Asking to go in, go out, go in, go out, go in, go out

 These are much easier and more fulfilling jobs than pulling a silly sled.

As far as the ample assed Mutatoe (and I feel that I need to provide a pronunciation guide for this, as I've been told it isn't very clear:  Moootahtoe), since his release from the Betty Ford Clinic for Cushy Hoarding, he isn't allow near soft things (clothes, socks, my down fluffiness) for fear that he will relapse and begin piling these items into a big pile and laying on it again. 

Therefore, the human woman does allow him to assist in the sorting of dirty clothes prior to being thrown into the loud stinky machine (aka: washer), where they go from stinky goodness, to smelling like a fake flower or stuffed bear that speaks and needs to be shredded (aka: corporate sellout bear).

As with most working dogs, Mutatoe has his very own method for sorting clothes, and here is a fine example of his work.

- Meeshka -

How Do They Do That?

I'm sure its never occurred to humans how dogs, no matter how much light, manage to run through a yard and not step in any poo, whereas humans managed to ALWAYS step in poo.

First of all, when you live with a lazy human woman who NEVER scoops the yard, despite her high tech poo scooper that makes scooping poo easy and clean, believe me, you develop a plan for pooing that involves only pooing in low traffic areas, plotting paths, and enforcing the claw when one of your gimpy co-horts violates the rule and leaves a tasty little package where it isn't suppose to be.

Coupled with our ultra high tech sensors such as 7 miles of nose buds that can smell poo (and tasty dead things to roll in) from miles away, and a keen sense of eyesight that rivals that bogus 6 million dollar man guy, we are perfectly capable of avoiding the most nasty of things no matter the lighting...

Except...

So, early this morning, despite the fact its one of those days where the human woman claims she is able to sleep in and not feed us or give us treats, or whatever and can lounge in my bed for hours and hours, we got her lazy butt up so we could pee and I needed to poo.  Its dark, but per our poo arrangement, I am able to easily navigate the minefield of the back yard and do my "business" and navigate back to the house, expecting my breakfast.

Mutatoe, who continues to be a suck up wannabe, ran over to where I had been and...

... he's so embarrassing, I mean seriously!  Like he couldn't smell that?  I would have smacked him down, but eeeuuuw.

He's all sorts of upset now because the human woman now calls him the "Pootatoe".  I think that name is going to stick... pun intended.

Meeshka

How I spent my morning

On This Day...

New From MeeshCO!

You may have seen those bracelets on tv that claim to dispel negative energy and bring stability to your life!   Frankly the human woman does that whenever she eats egg salad sandwiches... oh wait, that's distributes negative odors and brings instability to the household, well, whatever, you know what I mean.

I find that humans are so gullible that they are most likely breaking limbs getting to their phones to order a zillion of these things when all they really have to do is tell people that annoy them to shut up (as we pups have all learned from Master Tubey, high priest of dispelling stupidity), thus dispelling all negative energy from their lives, along with stocking up on tasty ice cream.

So, now that I've just taught you humans how to dispel negative energy, wouldn't you rather spend your money on something that will make you irresistible and loved?  Wouldn't you rather have people greet you with open arms and invite you to places?  Wouldn't you rather be the life of the party?  Screw negative energy and balance, you want to have everyone to love you!

Introducing: iPopular!

Made from only the finest Gallus gallus domesticus materials, and secured around your neck with fine silken-like but not really silk materials, the iPopular will guarantee that you are the MOST popular person at any function you attend.  Even standing in line to pick up your stupid dry cleaning, people will talk about you and want to be around you... they'll probably even take pictures of you, because who can resist the fine craftmanship of the iPopular and the stunning person wearing it.

A must have for people with no social skills or friends, put on the iPopular and feel the love as people point at you in awe and respect.

Be warned, your popularity from the moment you put the iPopular will grow so quickly that it could be a bit overwhelming, so until you are use to its powerful ability to draw friends to you, you'll want to wear some sensible shoes.

Be the first one on your block to own the iPopular, yours for only the low low price of $19.95 plus shipping and handling.  If you call now, we'll give you TWO iPopulars, one for yourself and another for friend so you can share the love.


iPopular, exclusively from MeeshCO, where quality is... quality.

Meeshka

Public Service Announcement

Woo is Me

I guess you must be wondering why I haven't made the call for everyone's "Uncle Jack Armageddon/Celebrity Death Ghoul Pool" guesses... sigh.

For reasons yet to be explained to us, Uncle Jack will not be visiting us this year.

I know.

Seriously, I know.

I'll wait until you're done howling with abject sadness.

Uncle Jack has visited us every year since I was a wee little fluffy puppy, and frankly I have no idea what we're going to do with ourselves this year.  Oh sure, the humans are still taking the time off and all, but still, there won't be any of this:

No waiting for Uncle Jack to wake up (or for the door to mysteriously open that allows us to jump and stomp on Uncle Jack)

And yes... no Celebrity Ghoul Pool! 

For those of you who aren't a regular reader (shame on you) every time Uncle Jack visits, a famous celebrity dies.  I'm still not sure my friends in Australia (Huffle, Opy) have ever forgiven him for killing off Steve Irwin.

Uncle Jack also brings along some sort of horrific natural catastrophe (Katrina is one fine example), and something in the human house usually breaks (attic fan, telephones).

I'm not sure if the earth has been notified that Uncle Jack won't be visiting (there's two hurricanes approaching the East Coast)... hmmm.  Perhaps we should hold the ghoul pool and the natural catastrophe pool, and the what will break at the human's house pool.  Maybe all these years it really wasn't Uncle Jack... maybe the HUMANS are the cause!

Regardless, we'll miss you Uncle Jack.  Wish you could visit this year, but we understand.  We'll just save up the claw for next year.

Meeshka

P.S.  We haven't told Spineless Bionic hip/knee puppy Sam that Uncle Jack isn't visiting.  We're seeing how long he stares out the window.  For all we know, he's staring at a bug.

Wordless Wednesday

The human woman's reaction that Bear-Bear's shooter only got 2 misdemeanors... well, better than nothing.

More thoughts on this on trenchant thursday.

Meeshka

Ode to Justice

I want a raise

Its food time, and I want food.  What do I get?  I get this crap:

I mean, good GAH!  How much do I have to put up with before I get out the claw!

Meeshka