Thursday, November 27, 2008

Thankful

Today is the day we sit down and eat a lot of good stuff and be thankful that we have good stuff to eat....

... and that my human woman is an idiot.

Meeshka

Monday, November 24, 2008

Support a Great Cause: finding pets loving homes

As your Queen it is up to me to make sure that we have plenty of HULA operatives to carry out our plans to take over the world. We cannot do this with captives locked behind bars. It is our duty to free as many of our dog (and cat) operatives so they can train their humans and prepare them for the day they will do our bidding.

Our operatives inside the Iams corporation have convinced their marketing people to start a drive to save 1 million pets this holiday season. Just think of it, 1 MILLION HULA operatives! We must spread the word of this great thing and make sure that everypup, kitty, and yes, even rabbits and whatever else happens to be in a horrible, cold, lonely, icky shelter finds a warm, loving, and plentiful food (and livergreat) home.

Spread the word! If you have a blog, tell others about this, e-mail me at: meeshkaworld@gmail.com and I'll send you the code to make the nifty thing on your sidebar!

I have it on good authority that if they adopt out 1 million pets, the wonderful Iams company will start making food of livergreat, so lets get out there and tell the human world to adopt from a shelter or rescue!

Meeshka
I COMMAND YOU!

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Good Bye Freda


Please take a moment to go to Freda's blog and give her humans some words of comfort.

We will miss dear Freda, until we meet again, happy and whole, across the Rainbow Bridge.

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Overcoming Barriers

I hear the humans always talking about barriers that they have to overcome.

Apparently woman have to overcome something called a glass ceiling. I would imagine that trying to overcome this type of barrier would be time consuming, after all, keeping a glass ceiling clean from leaves, bird poo and dirt would take up a lot of time. I imagine that a giant squeegee is necessary for that job.

There is also something called a race barrier, which I imagine has something to do with NASCAR and the driving around of cars on a circle. It be the whole gas crisis thing and justifying why its ok for some people to drive a bunch of cars round and round on a circle road going nowhere instead of saving that for humans to go to work and make enough money to buy their dogs livergreat.

There are all sorts of other barriers that humans must overcome, so I thought that I would use my superior intelligence to show them that barriers are very easy to overcome... if humans weren't so stupid.

You see a barrier, you find a way around it, then you sit there until the human notices you sitting someplace that you shouldn't be sitting, then you give that human a big ol smile, rubbing in the fact that you clearly are much smarter than they are... and you spend your precious time napping while they squeegee a stupid glass ceiling.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Squirrel Check

Hey everypup,

I'm glad to see that everyone is doing their part to stop the squirrel terrorists. They are brazen little furry snacks, aren't they?

I also wanted to thank Biloxi for his comment that perhaps a terrorist squirrel infiltrated our kitchen and poisoned my food, which caused my face to swell up. I had not thought of such a devious ploy, but I certainly wouldn't put it past those evil stupid squirrels. Biloxi mentioned that a lot of royalty employ food tasters to taste their food to make sure that it hasn't been poisoned.

EXCELLENT idea, and who more expendable... I mean more qualified to taste my food than the Mutatoe! He's got a sensitive stomach, so I figure that qualifies him to test my food and make sure that it doesn't contain anything that would harm me... unfortunately I didn't take into account one thing:

Stupid Mutatoe!

Meeshka

Monday, November 10, 2008

Good Bye Girl-Girl and Fly


It is with a heavy heart that I report that our honorary HULA member, and hamsterrier Girl Girl has crossed the Rainbow Bridge.

Run free and whole sweet Girl Girl, and say hello to Fu-Fu for us.

I also must report that dedicated guard pup Fly has also crossed the Rainbow Bridge today. Fly was the beloved guardian of the "curly tails" and kept princess Kara safe from harm.

They will both be missed greatly on this earth, until we meet again, across the Rainbow Bridge.

Sunday, November 09, 2008

I'm OK!

Wow pups, that was a close call!

After I posted the call to paws for everypup to take action against the terrorist squirrels, a horrible thing happened to me! For some strange reason the entire right side of my face started to swell up, it was HORRIBLE!

My face was all puffy and I could barely open my eye and it itched and I was horribly inconvenienced and uncomfortable! The human woman and man totally freaked out when they saw me, and that freaked me out because I couldn't see myself until they showed me in a mirror and then I was like "um... that's not good at all!"

So, you would have thought that the humans would have immediately thrown me in my harness and driven me straight to the doctor for treatment. Um... no, of course not. The humans ran to Ikea and bought furniture. Yep, they left me alone with the mutatoes where I could have swollen up like a hippo and they wouldn't have known it, just to buy furniture. Ungrateful I tell you.

I made sure they paid dearly upon their return by acting very pathetic and mopey to get maximum sympathy. They fawned over me the rest of the night, so that was nice, but still no trip to the vet.

This morning I woke up and the swelling was all gone, and I feel much better. The human woman went out and bought me some very tasty sensitive skin foods and a much tastier canned food but she also found some kind of stupid stinky spray that is suppose to help with my itchiness. It smells horrible, not horrible like a good fresh dead thing, but horrible like all pretty flowery junk. I made it very clear that I will not tolerate that stuff.

So, what was it that caused my face to swell up like that? I have a theory...

The human woman thinks its an allergy and maybe I got bitten by a bug, but I think it was those evil squirrels!

Stupid squirrel voodoo dolls!!!!

Saturday, November 08, 2008

A Call to Paws!

This is a HULA alert broadcast! Please stand by for a special announcement from your Queen of the World, the honorable and fluffy Meeshka.

Ahem!

My fellow mammals, I am shocked and saddened by the recent turn of events in our nation and across this earth of ours. I have warned you all of a faction of suicidal terrorist squirrels that were wreaking havoc not only in communities by starting fires or disrupting the power supply, but we also had reports that squirrel factions were disrupting the voting process and causing registered cats and dogs from gathering at polling places and marking their vote for the Turbo/Khyra ticket, thus losing the race to free us all from the leash of oppression.

Just in case you were wondering, this rash of squirrelalution is happening all over the world; shop lifting squirrels, causing accidents, and even more power outages, and evacuations!

Now, while our very safety and livlihoods are threatened, not to mention the squirrels’ annoying capacity to dash just out of our reach and thwart our attempts to stop their civil disobedience, the following picture will demonstrate just how brazen and pompous these squirrels have gotten, and how they feel that they have won over us superior pups and cats! Thanks to Princess Sunshine Meadow (Wiggle Butt clan) for bringing this horror to our attention!

This is a call to paws! All HULA members will continue their activities to overthrow the humans, but we must be diligent and abolish the squirrel population as quickly as possible. This is war! All pups and kitties must sharpen their claws and remove this threat from our world!

Be aware, as spy squirrels have already been captured in Iran and there is proof on that site of terrorist squirrel training going on throughout the world!

Be careful... they may be armed.

Your Queen
Meeshka

Wednesday, November 05, 2008

Election Outcome

I am not at all pleased today with the results of the election.

It is quite clear that while the humans have made some strives in accepting races, cultures, and creeds into their lives, they have done nothing to accept species and breeds.

We still struggle under this leash of oppression and now, more than ever it is our time to pull free from this tyranny that keeps us from bacon, cheese, livergreat and kleenex!

As Queen of the World, I do not accept this as a defeat, nay I see it as another opportunity. Therefore, we will, as of today, secede from the humans and form our own dog Government led by Turbo and Khyra... until then.... I'm going to take a nap on the cool air vent.

good evening everypup

Saturday, November 01, 2008

Another Suicide Squirrel Attack



Sam E. Winks reporting from the HNN news desk, a suicide squirrel terrorist caused a major power outage in the Richmond, Virginia area today. Chaos ensued as humans were trapped in elevators, there was no cold air vents blowing air and some ice cream was ruined in a cold box.

A spokesvacuum with the Animal D. campaign hinted that the squirrel may have been linked with the Turbo campaign, its last known workplace was Fluffy Tail Industries, a subsidiary of VP candidate Khyra's successful grooming products line. "This is an outright ploy to show our candidate in no light." Animal D's spokesman report, " Turbo knows the importance of electricity to the cause of cleaning up america and is doing everything he can to thwart our campaign and disenfranchise the voters!"

We will continue to monitor the story and report any updates as soon as we receive them.

Special News Bulletin


Good afternoon, everypup, I'm Sam E. Winks from the Husky News Network.

We interrupt our regularly scheduled program to bring you a news story that just crossed our wire.

Shortly after the non-human party presidential debate held at Unity College this afternoon, sources have revealed a serious allegation about the Suction Party's plans for immigration reform.

An anonymous source has provided the Husky News Network with shocking documents that claim that the Suction Party, namely the presidential candidate Dyson Animal, is planning to allow the mass immigration of Australian Dysons into the country. While D. Animal mentions that the vacuums of Australia will join him in his, and I quote: "mission to clean up the world", end quote, he did not add that Australia vacuums would receive diplomatic immunity and be allowed into the U.S. without undergoing electrical transformation, as required by other foreign vacuums entering the country. Response has been strong to the inference that all households will be required to provide 240 volt power and plug adapters at their own cost to accomodate the new "diplomatic cleaners".

Public outrage over this possibility has been violent in some areas, with some factions insisting that all immigrants go through the proper electrical transformations, while other factions insisting that the U.S. be more accomodating to voltage diversity.

In other news, governmental sources have revealed that D. Animals step-aunt from Uzbekistan has been living in the U.S. illegally for the past 2 years. Ms. Oreck, the sister of D. Animal's adopted father, sweeps in subsidized housing in Detroit, MI and claims to enter the country when she feels like, using a home-made and illegally wired transformer to make money and send it back to Uzbekistan.

Neither party was available for comment at this time, but we will continue to monitor this story and bring you updates as they come in.