Another Suicide Squirrel Attack



Sam E. Winks reporting from the HNN news desk, a suicide squirrel terrorist caused a major power outage in the Richmond, Virginia area today. Chaos ensued as humans were trapped in elevators, there was no cold air vents blowing air and some ice cream was ruined in a cold box.

A spokesvacuum with the Animal D. campaign hinted that the squirrel may have been linked with the Turbo campaign, its last known workplace was Fluffy Tail Industries, a subsidiary of VP candidate Khyra's successful grooming products line. "This is an outright ploy to show our candidate in no light." Animal D's spokesman report, " Turbo knows the importance of electricity to the cause of cleaning up america and is doing everything he can to thwart our campaign and disenfranchise the voters!"

We will continue to monitor the story and report any updates as soon as we receive them.

Comments

  1. Hey, I was in Gettysburg!

    I've got witnesses that saw me there -

    Although we did see a skhwirrel -

    Khyra
    AKA MFT

    ReplyDelete
  2. This is better than any Australian election!

    Huffle Mawson, Honorary Husky and Explorer Cat

    ReplyDelete
  3. Anonymous9:55 PM

    hey meeshka, i know i don't blog anymore but i read your blog all the time! i live in richmond, va but i wasn't affected by the power outage BUT we did have a small dip in power after this
    squirrel came to an untimely death while trying to cross over some wires a couple weeks ago. i thought you'd like to see him, he hung there dead for 3 weeks! mom and dad placed bets on how long he would last. i think mom won. but, of course dad had to take the picture!

    ReplyDelete
  4. WOO WOO Meeshka

    We think Turbo is being framed!!!

    Hugs
    Thor and Marco Polo

    ReplyDelete
  5. New campaign slogan:
    "A dead squirrel in every plot"

    Woos,
    Star

    ReplyDelete

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