Sunday, May 18, 2008

Meeshka's Big Adventure

Ok, it wasn't such a big adventure, I simply went to the vet and got poked, prodded, and abused.

It was fun (up until the poking and prodding) prancing out of the house while the gimpies screamed with jealousy from inside the house. Hey, they had their turns, so its only right that I get a chance to be chauffeured in my luxurious 4-runner, which I left in a very fluffy state.

I really do like the new clinic, all the interesting smells, and the owners have stupidly left a whole box of rawhide treats well within my reach. The human woman is wise to my exploits and pulled me away in time to save them from me.

I didn't get a chance to meet the stuffed lab dog that kicked Loki's ample ass, there was another dog that thought it was real and was barking at it, so I figured I wouldn't go over and destuff it in front of everyone. I did get to see another husky, who was certainly NOT breed standard by any stretch of the imagination, I'm guessing a pet store model. His owners had been basking in the admiration of the other humans until I sauntered into the place with my perfect fluffiness, and everyone literally ran over to me and told me how beautiful and fluffy I was. I allowed them to pet me, and even french kissed one woman, who seemed a bit shocked at how quick such a fluffy beauty such as myself could be.

Oddly enough they didn't have my own private exam room ready (an oversight on the vet place's part I'm sure) so we had to wait a bit for my exam. While all of the other dogs pulled and barked and jumped around and caused a ruckus, I simply lay down at the human woman's feet, crossed my little dainty front paws and watched all of the chaos and laughed to myself. What morons. I was so stylish in my blue harness and everyone watched me with adoration.

When it was my turn, they took me into a room and that's where the usual horrible things happened. I screamed really loud when they tried to put that nasty thermometer in my butt. I mean come on, that's just not right, but at least I was in a private room and nobody could see it happen, but I made sure that everyone KNEW that I was being tortured.

Apparently I'm going to have to get my teeth cleaned. They haven't been as white as they should be and some are giving me some issues. I don't know why I just can't wear those cool teeth whitening strips I see on tv, but apparently they'll have to knock me out and clean them for that deep down clean. I also heard the human woman mention something to the effect of "while she's out, clip her toenails". Um... excuse me? So, yes, there is apparently a plot to rid me of my lethal weapons when I can't protest.

Before they can clean my teeth and steal my weapons they had to take some blood from me, so I got to go with the vet tech person. I really didn't want to leave, but since she insisted, I left with her... then proceeded to introduce myself to every dog in every exam room, inspect all of their equipment, jump on tables that apparently held important things, and generally was a wonderful pest. My humans later said that all they could hear was "Meeshka, no, Meeshka leave that alone, Meeshka over here, no Meeshka, MEESHKA" while I was gone.

When I returned, I tried to leave, thinking all of that horrible stuff was over with, but no... I had to get my shots and that crap sprayed up my nose. I hate the stuff in the nose, didn't even feel the shots through all of my fluffy, but the nose thing! Like last year, I turned my head at the last minute but this time the human man got it right in the face. hehehe! They brought another one in and got me though.

While the human man paid the bill, I relaxed outside in the shade. Please note that in order to be a fashion model, you must be able to strike the same pose no matter what the location. This time I opted for a minor variation of the paw crossing, but nailed the behind the shoulder, slightly amused look once again.

Oh, I guess for some reason I need to mention that I weighed in at a very svelte 71 lbs. For some reason the humans gasped at this number and mentioned something about a diet again. I have noticed that my food portions have shrunk again. I guess I'll just have to steal some of the Mutatoe's food if they get serious about this diet thing. If anyone needs to lose some weight off his ample ass, its the Mutatoe.



  1. Anonymous9:32 AM

    Ut oh your post reminded mom that it was time to take us into the vet also. I usually am brave except when it comes to the vet. :(


  2. I'll be sure to inkhlude some green beans in my pakhkage to you!

    You look sooooo Sibergenikhk in your pikhs!!

    I khan only imagine how many humans will now be naming and/or renaming their children without regard to species MEESHKA after hearing it soooo often AND seeing how beeWOOtious woo were -

    No more Maria's - I just khyssed a girl named Maria


  3. Meeshka, you look marvelous, as usual. More of you to love, and since we all love you, there needs to be a lot of you........

    PS - So glad that you were able to save gas and get the human man vaccinated too!

  4. I am sure that 20 of the 71 pounds is fur so I wouldn't worry. What is the stuff up the nose? I have nver had that before.

  5. I'm so sorry you had to go through that!

    Woo woo, KA

  6. This comment has been removed by the author.

  7. Meeshka,
    Thanks for stopping by to check on Tasha. I am surprised that no one has made fun of her crop circles yet. Between those, her shaved belly and the metal bracket in her leg, she's an easy target but Momma says I have to be nice.


    P.S. I don't like that stuff up my nose either. It always makes me sneeze all over them.
    P.S.S. I had to delete the prior comment because my talons are too long and I miskeyed alot.

  8. Apparently they aren't taking into account all the fluffy fur you have to carry around! Good job screaming and letting the human man get the snose spray!!

    Your photo's look lovely, and yes, they look extremely similar, but hey, when you have "the pose" down, why change it?


  9. Queen Meeshka, you totally nailed that look. I am taking notes for future poses.

    I don't know what the spray up the nose is either but it sounds nasty.

    I'm just sorry you didn't get to take on the giant stuffed dog. You would have shown the mutatoe a thing or two!

    Huffle Mawson, Explorer Cat

  10. It's nice that the hooman man won't be getting kennel cough any time soon! We feel your pain, Meeshka! We had to endure the same indignities a few weeks ago and we are on a "diet" too. The food bowls aren't as full as usual and our treats are not quite as large as usual. The whole thing just sucks!

    Poppy & Penny

  11. Lovely pose, Meeshka! Way to work it! Dave said to tell you you look lovely in blue. Well, d'uh... what color wouldn't you look lovely in?! Boys.
    I was quiet at my last vet trip for the thermometer, the blood draw and the other intrusive things. I screamed bloody murder when they wanted to shave my wrist for the blood pressure, though. Ha roo roo roo! Gotta keep 'em guessing!
    Tail wags,

  12. Woos Meeshka,
    you do indeed look lovely in those photos. Have to admit, I was looking forward to seeing you destuff the fake lab, but it was gracious of you to leave it for the less-mentally endowed dogs to bark at. I had my teeth worked on last year and they are much whiter and I feel better now that the nasty one is gone. It wasn't so bad.

    and a-roos from Jack

  13. Wait a minute - they poke you in the butt with something, they stick you with needles, they steal your blood, they discuss knocking you out to brush your teeth AND clip your nails......and then they want you to stop eating? Who ARE these people?

  14. The thermometer incident is not very dignified for a bewootiful Sibe like yourself.

  15. Anonymous7:53 PM

    Oh MEeshka,
    Despite the aweful things the humans did to you, you look very bee-roo-tuful in your photos!!!