Meeshka's Big Adventure

Ok, it wasn't such a big adventure, I simply went to the vet and got poked, prodded, and abused.

It was fun (up until the poking and prodding) prancing out of the house while the gimpies screamed with jealousy from inside the house. Hey, they had their turns, so its only right that I get a chance to be chauffeured in my luxurious 4-runner, which I left in a very fluffy state.

I really do like the new clinic, all the interesting smells, and the owners have stupidly left a whole box of rawhide treats well within my reach. The human woman is wise to my exploits and pulled me away in time to save them from me.

I didn't get a chance to meet the stuffed lab dog that kicked Loki's ample ass, there was another dog that thought it was real and was barking at it, so I figured I wouldn't go over and destuff it in front of everyone. I did get to see another husky, who was certainly NOT breed standard by any stretch of the imagination, I'm guessing a pet store model. His owners had been basking in the admiration of the other humans until I sauntered into the place with my perfect fluffiness, and everyone literally ran over to me and told me how beautiful and fluffy I was. I allowed them to pet me, and even french kissed one woman, who seemed a bit shocked at how quick such a fluffy beauty such as myself could be.

Oddly enough they didn't have my own private exam room ready (an oversight on the vet place's part I'm sure) so we had to wait a bit for my exam. While all of the other dogs pulled and barked and jumped around and caused a ruckus, I simply lay down at the human woman's feet, crossed my little dainty front paws and watched all of the chaos and laughed to myself. What morons. I was so stylish in my blue harness and everyone watched me with adoration.

When it was my turn, they took me into a room and that's where the usual horrible things happened. I screamed really loud when they tried to put that nasty thermometer in my butt. I mean come on, that's just not right, but at least I was in a private room and nobody could see it happen, but I made sure that everyone KNEW that I was being tortured.

Apparently I'm going to have to get my teeth cleaned. They haven't been as white as they should be and some are giving me some issues. I don't know why I just can't wear those cool teeth whitening strips I see on tv, but apparently they'll have to knock me out and clean them for that deep down clean. I also heard the human woman mention something to the effect of "while she's out, clip her toenails". Um... excuse me? So, yes, there is apparently a plot to rid me of my lethal weapons when I can't protest.

Before they can clean my teeth and steal my weapons they had to take some blood from me, so I got to go with the vet tech person. I really didn't want to leave, but since she insisted, I left with her... then proceeded to introduce myself to every dog in every exam room, inspect all of their equipment, jump on tables that apparently held important things, and generally was a wonderful pest. My humans later said that all they could hear was "Meeshka, no, Meeshka leave that alone, Meeshka over here, no Meeshka, MEESHKA" while I was gone.

When I returned, I tried to leave, thinking all of that horrible stuff was over with, but no... I had to get my shots and that crap sprayed up my nose. I hate the stuff in the nose, didn't even feel the shots through all of my fluffy, but the nose thing! Like last year, I turned my head at the last minute but this time the human man got it right in the face. hehehe! They brought another one in and got me though.

While the human man paid the bill, I relaxed outside in the shade. Please note that in order to be a fashion model, you must be able to strike the same pose no matter what the location. This time I opted for a minor variation of the paw crossing, but nailed the behind the shoulder, slightly amused look once again.

Oh, I guess for some reason I need to mention that I weighed in at a very svelte 71 lbs. For some reason the humans gasped at this number and mentioned something about a diet again. I have noticed that my food portions have shrunk again. I guess I'll just have to steal some of the Mutatoe's food if they get serious about this diet thing. If anyone needs to lose some weight off his ample ass, its the Mutatoe.

Meeshka