My Gadgets

 Hey!

Generally I discovered that my humans are old and somewhat lazy, especially the Bleeder. For some odd reason, she doesn't like to play tug with me and constantly yelps and stomps off to throw on yet another bandaid. Mr. Toast stubbed his little toe on one of the many barriers in the house (I call them the NO FUN walls), and hissing every time I gnaw, stomp, claw, or nibble on that toe... go figure.

Anyway, back to lazy people.

Just as an FYI, I will be recommending products through Amazon Affiliates because I'm not cheap and require some sort of reward for my testing of these products. I'll tell you what is great, and what is not so great and if you buy them, well, puppy needs treats. All links are stuffs the humans have bought me, they didn't get anything from anyone from buying them.

One of my first toys is the Cheerble Wicked Bone. It's an interactive chew bone that you can throw in automatic/interactive, or drive around and make jump and spin.

At first, I didn't know what to think of this thing

What the heck?

It moved on its own, and seemed possessed and out to kill me.

But after a while, I realized... hey, this thing is pretty fun and chewable! It doesn't stomp off and put band-aids on itself all the time.

I also have a ball toy called Wicked Ball.

Same thing, it spins and rolls on its own and flashes its flashy lights and I love to cram it into a corner and beat it into submission.

My next "toy" is an automatic feeder, which isn't a toy, and it's not really fun, but it dispenses pellets of joy and energy. The Pet Safe Smart Feeder has many bells and whistles for the humans, such as... they sadistically control when you eat, how much you eat, when you get snacks, and the very cruel, disable the quick snack feature button on the top when you discover how to use it and try to empty out the goodie bin. It also lets them know (on the handy phone app) when you got fed (thwarting all plans to look pathetic as though you have not been fed) and can tap the app to give you a snack (which rarely happens around here). Mr. Toast controls the feeding. It will also sense when you run low on food and will auto-order your food... which is good because as I said early, my humans are old and slow (body and mind).

I feel that the feeding schedule is crap, so when I'm hungry I sit and stare at it, willing foodables to drop like some horrible slot machine of kibble.

When that doesn't work, I pour on the "I'm starving and can't last another 10 minutes until lunch, PUHLEEEEEZE give me some kibbles before I waste away" look.

Then when that doesn't work, I go for the "I can barely sit up, come on, have mercy, just 5 kibbles!" look.

The next "toy" is more like a horrible nightmare. This thing... I mean seriously... is NOT fun.

The loud gobble up my toy machine kicks off whenever Mr. Toast thinks I've been too messy.

This thing careens around like a drunken robot and sucks up tasty things like crumbs, and essential things like my furs and toys. I hate the loud gobble machine with a passion and they've taken to locking me in my crate when it's bumping around and sucking up my precious things because I really, really hate it, and I've figured out that if I pee in front of it, it gets sent back to its home.

Wanna know another thing I hate... when this happens.

Mr. Toast is NOT funny.

Casey