New HULA Member: Shenzi

Dear Meeshka

My foster brother Quinn is a proud HULA member and he is training me as an up-and-coming operative. He said I should apply for membership now and that maybe you could give me some tips to make me the best HULA member every. I’m young and eager to learn.

I caused foster mom to freak out before I even met her (I am that good). You see, the animal shelter confiscated me and my whole family (mom, dad and my four siblings) from a neglectful situation. When the shelter called foster mom, they said they had confiscated seven huskies. Mom freaked. Then they said five were unsocialized puppies. Mom freaked some more. THEN they said one was a runt with rickets – that was me! Foster mom freaked even more and was out the door and on her way to the shelter in under five minutes.

I’ve got "Demonstrating Disruptive Behavior" down pretty well; I am a husky puppy after all. I like to wake foster mom up at all hours of the night with my lovely singing voice. Every couple of hours I wake up all the other dogs (and foster mom too) with my singing. Once everybody is awake, I go back to sleep for an hour or so. Once they settle down, I start in again. If I have to be in the crate, then I’m going to let everybody know how I feel about it.

I haven’t been able to destroy anything yet, that evil foster mom is always watching me. But I’m working on it; I really like the taste of the vacuum cleaner. I also like the taste of that power strip with all the aquarium cords plugged into it. Foster brother Quinn ate a laptop power cord when he was a puppy so I'm hoping to follow in his footsteps.

I’m really good at human behavior modification. Since I wasn’t handled the first three months of my life I don’t like humans touching me. So I’ve got foster mom trained to hand feed me all my meals. I hope to someday be a princess and be handfed filet mignon. I’ve also trained foster mom to always have treats for me in her pocket. I’ve taught he that I’ll only allow her touch me if she gives me food first. Boy am I good, I get treats and touching (on my own terms) all at once!

The human hasn’t dressed me up yet; I won’t let her get close enough to touch me. And if being touched leads to being dressed up, I’ll never let her touch me! But since she can't get close enough to touch me, that evil human gave me a humiliating nickname - Baby Bop. And she even sings, "Baby Bop. Bop Shoo Bop" at me. I'm still trying to figure out a way to get close enough to claw her without letting her touching me.

I haven’t tried Kleenex yet, is it yummy? Before I was rescued I didn’t get much food, so I’m really happy just getting puppy food every day. Oh, and the diced ham I taught the human to keep in her pockets.

What else can I do to become a full-fledged HULA member? Once I’m a member, I hope to get my brother, sisters and parents to join up too.

Your eager disciple

Shenzi

- Congratulations! Meeshka