The Art of Horka

I’m glad Turbo asked about the Art of Horka because its very important for all dogs to understand that horka is indeed an art form, and has some rules.

For those humans that don’t know what horka means, I’ll put it in more human terms:
vomit
throw up
drive the porcelain bus
heave
spew
blow chunks

Must I go on?

The rules of horka are very simple as well:

1.) If you have a choice between horkaing on something easy to clean or something impossible to clean, switch positions so you hit the impossible to clean area. I, myself, have walked several feet in order to avoid horkaing on linoleum just to get to the carpet.

2.) if the humans put something under you to catch the horka, at the last minute turn your head and horka on their antique persian rug.

3.) If nobody is watching, horka in a shoe or other human clothing item. They appreciate the surprise later on when they find it.

4.) Horka in the middle of the night, do it right on the bed. That gets everyone up and moving.

5.) If possible, horka up something they never expected, like a sock or pair of underwear. If you horka up a pair of underwear, make sure you do it in front of company.

Last but not least:

6.) Wait until they clean up the horka... then horka again in a different spot.

The art of horka depends on your preference. Sasha tells me that she’s a hunched over standing horka type. She’s also mobile, which spreads the horka out farther and wider, more to clean up.

I prefer the standing straight as possible ear bob horka, as demonstrated below:

ears forward on the hork, ears back on the A, and ending with a very loud yiiiiiiack for emphasis.

So, what’s your favorite or most interesting place to horka, and do you have a style of your own?

Meeshka